They launched —flashcards that taught test-taking psychology, not content. How to spot distractors. When to skip. Why panic is a pattern.

Three weeks later, Maya took the real MCAT. She used the Quack Constant. She guessed on 47 questions. She finished each section in 18 minutes and spent the rest of the time drawing ducks in her booklet.

That night, they redesigned QuackPrep.org. The duck stayed, but the lies left. The new tagline: "Stop stressing. Start guessing. Ethically."

"Twelve correct guesses out of 47," Aris said, finally turning. His eyes were bloodshot. "That's 25.5% above random chance. You're welcome."

She drove there.

"And how many times was it C?"

The first video opened with Aris wearing a lab coat and a rubber duck mask. "Forget glycolysis," he whispered. "Remember this: Every answer is C until proven otherwise. That's the Quack Constant."

Maya laughed. Then she took notes.